You seriously need to get laid my friend. Or, if you struggle with that for whatever reason (ie you look like Ian Dowie or you have an inverted peni$), then I recommend heating a piece of liver in the microwave for 10 seconds. This is better than the traditional "warm apple pie" substitute, and far easier to hide if your mum/carer comes in the room mid-thrusting.
Happy shafting
Happy shafting
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